Marmalade and Magic Maggots.
Cheeky rabbit in the bar
Sings the blues, plays slide guitar
Then goes round collecting money
Insisting his name is, Blind Boy Bunny.
Electric eel, dance jig and reel
To fiddle, whistle and drum
When people start mocking, eel starts
Each derriere and bum.
Poor, wee, sleeket Jock
Head got stuck in village stock.
Vegetables thrown by muckle fatties
Cabbage, turnips aye, an' wee small tatties.
Birds at dawn, put trousers on
Then go outside to cheep.
Been doing that for centuries
Leaving guano, in a heap.
Drunken mole, peeps out of hole
Don't remember what he done
Money gone, at chilly dawn
Mole hopes that he had fun.
SDLP, set out to sea
In beautiful pea green boat.
The reality is, Mark Durkin can't swim
Let's hope that he can float.
DUP, sat down to tea
In the last dog days of Summer.
Sammy Wilson alas, gave flash of ass
Peter Robinson spat out, "BUMMER!"
Shinners all in Donegal
"Chuckie-ar-la!" they shout.
Gerry takes them to Bundoran beach
But finds the tides gone out!
The UUP sing merrily
Reg Emprey plays guitar.
They haven't gone up, they haven't gone down
So they remain just where they are.
A lawyer rare, with silvery hair
Saw his reflection and gave a stare.
Then Bob McCartney of exalted station
Sued his reflection for impersonation.
"It's an abomination to the nation,"
Iris Robinson said to spouse.
Shinners gather, for How's Your Father
In inflatable Wendy house.
Michael McGimpsy feeling blue
Has he got the old swine flu?
Michael search all round his house
To put face mask on coughing mouse.
Earwigs never toast a bun
It's not the thing, it's just not done.
Never say, "Hey, pass the vinaigrette"
That's a slur on the earwigs' etiquette.
I ate margarine on the village green
'Till not one sane word I could utter.
I staggered home for tea, just myself and me
And I couldn't tell Stork from butter!
Nice wee fairy in the park
Comes out to play when it is dark.
It asked me home for Earl Grey tea
What a nice fairy it seems to be!
Now, come on Sean, put earphones on
It's time to start the show.
Stop your talking and school boy gawking
At pretty girls in a row.
NOW! go home and prepare for Government!
(Little silly David Steele)